Texting and Dating
April 23, 2008 at 6:37 pm lbowden 2 comments
When did text messaging become an acceptable form of communication in the world of dating? All I know is that three years ago, I looked up and the majority of my communication with my latest crush was via text. I changed the text alert on my cell phone to an obnoxious ringer so that I would get his latest 15 word message ASAP. After a night of texting, I would feel as though we had really connected. The truth was, if we’d actually had a conversation instead of exchanging a series of five word messages, we would’ve been on the phone for less than three minutes—not much of a connection after all.
But, of course, that was three years ago. Now that I’m in my late 20’s, I’m sure I wouldn’t accept a text as any real form of exchange with someone I was really interested in. Again, let’s test this new theory on my most recent love interest, Victor.
Vic called me a few days after we first met. We had a great two-hour conversation. Fabulous! We can really hold one another’s attention and make each other laugh. No need for text messaging. Boy was I wrong. After that first gab fest, Vic’s new method of contacting me was texting. We would go back and forth everyday, but it was nothing substantial—just a hi or how’s your day going. Was he toying with me now—thinking he could get me out of my courtship frame of mind? Am I not worthy of a conversation? We hadn’t actually been on a date yet, so maybe I was reading into our initial phone call?
But then, I ran into him at another party and he told me he wanted to take me to dinner at one of the best restaurants in the city. Maybe I wasn’t reading into things. We settled on the following Thursday.
Several days passed and I hadn’t heard from Vic. Maybe he had changed his mind about our dinner date. Finally, Wednesday arrives and I receive an unexpected text. It was from Vic—“since you didn’t reply to my text it’s OK if you don’t want to go to dinner anymore.” What?!? Several thoughts rushed through my head: #1) I never received a text formalizing our dinner plans. #2) Who formalizes plans for a first date via text? #3) Does this even justify a response? By now, I had a little crush on Mr. Victor and he had offered to take me to a fine restaurant. At least I would get three good courses out of it, right?
So, I went on the first date. Vic and I have been going strong ever since. Even still, texting has not been eliminating from our relationship as a form of communication.
~Southern Fried CHICK
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1.
Marmalade | April 23, 2008 at 7:23 pm
You know, I have a bunch of friends (dudes) who think texting is the way to kick off the relationship. Up until hearing them, I thought phone convo was the way to go. So I tried the “texting” thing on my latest pursuit…..she quickly shut it down. Was like “you must be a texter huh…?” Yea, I don’t do those. Want to talk, talk. Otherwise…..
Now I only text my mother, brother, sister and friends with no benefits. Keep up the blog.
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Black | April 23, 2008 at 7:53 pm
Girl…I think texting is a great way to convey a short point of information. It is not, however a way to maintain a romance! Guys these days don’t seem to get that and we seem to accept what they give us. To me its just another way for them to keep a barrier between themselves and real emotions. On the other hand (to be fair), I have had guy friends say they would not want to call during the day to interrupt my work so they text to say “how’s your day going.” This does not serve as a valid excuse for evening texts…but it also shows a sense of insecurity on the guy’s part. They are not sure if you want them to call you so the text to be on the safe side. Sigh…