Respect my Authority!

I walked into the room, armed with my notes and agenda. As a new manager, I was determined to be extremely prepared. I had attended way too many useless meetings in my career and refused to waste my employee’s time. I entered the small room where we would gather for our meeting and waited for my eight direct reports to show up.  I tried to remember that I wanted to come across as in control but not forceful, knowledgeable but not all-knowing, flexible but stern. With my back to the table, I jotted notes and agenda on the white board as three of my employees entered the room. They were extremely early, which I appreciated. We exchanged pleasantries and I continued to write on the board.  As they sat quietly, he broke the silence.

Him: “CHICK-let what kind of jeans of those?”

Me:  Silence. i was ready for questions on the action plan, the due dates and best practices, i was not prepared for questions on the brand of my jeans. I had no idea what to say.

Him: “I have seen a few women wearing those jeans and I am not familiar with them, what type of jeans are those?”

ME: ”Um, okay, well I don’t know if they make mens jeans but they are Joe’s Jeans, it’s the honey cut, they are made for women who…”

Him: “Oh thanks, I was asking because I saw the logo, I mean its not like I am looking at your butt or anything but I just wanted to know what type of jeans those are”

 

In true male fashion, his two comrades that he came into the room with began to chuckle. I could feel my eyes turning red and I could definitely feel myself about to read and re-enact the riot act on him. First of all,  as any woman can tell you, the only way to recognize Joe’s Jeans is by the double JJ on the butt. so clearly his inquisitive nature was the result of him looking at my backside. somehow this man has no filter and decided to pose that question aloud, I took for granted that everyone’s parents taught them about thoughts to keep inside your head versus things to say aloud.

 

Furthermore, how dare he have the nerve to pose such an inappropriate question and then followup with such a ridiculous justification! I am not his personal shopper, I am his manager. WTF! With one thoughtless comment, he undermined my credibility as a manager. And I KNOW he knew better, he is a former investment banker, you mean they don’t teach bankers that some comments are inappropriate? To make matters worse, he tried to pretend he wasn’t checking me out. I mean cmon, Joes Jeans logo is on the butt, not on the ankles or knee caps.

Okay so maybe it was my fault for wearing my favorite jeans to the meeting but that’s the culture here, everyone wears jeans and the dress code is extremely casual. Besides, who wants to wear mom jeans in 2008? As i tried to think of a response, thankfully, the other employees came into the room.

I learned one lesson from that interaction, don’t wear logo jeans to a meeting. From now on I am only wearing nondescript jeans with no logo nor brand nor design on the backside. That’s right if I have to be taken seriously as a manager then fine I wont wear anymore more seven jeans, no more Joe’s Jeans, no more True Religion.  From here on out its straight H&M jeans with no logos!  

So I sat down for the rest of the meeting, I couldn’t bring myself to continue writing on the board and turn my backside to them. As I started the meeting, I glanced in his direction and tried to think of a way to deal with this arrogant former-banker who had undermined my authority by indirectly referencing my body parts in front of male colleagues.

Seeing him smile at his two comrades, I knew that it would be a long six months, and I was already looking forward to the end of this project and not having to work with this jerk.

 

-CHICKlet